Generousity is from your heart, not your pocketbook

Last week I listened to a short video about being a world class speaker by Bo Eason, something that is so far out of my comfort zone that I shiver at the thought. The third tip he gave was to be generous, to give it all, lay your all out in front of everyone, and not hold anything back on stage. This not only takes generosity, but extreme courage. I hope I can find the courage to be that generous...scary stuff.

It is so funny in our society, how we love to hate the people that give it all for us. The comedians, actors, athletes and public figures. I remember watching Survivor a few years ago, when an older lady (a fabulous@50 lady) stepped forward and took a leadership role to get a fire started and get shelter. She took so much flack by some of the other team members for stepping up. No one else would, yet they criticized her for being bossy, all because none of them had the guts to do it. 

Marianne Williamson said it best in her poem "The Deepest Fear".

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.

So back to the generosity part. How generous are you? I am not talking money, how quick are you to really be generous, with your heart and soul? Believe me, I know how hard this is, it is much easier to show up at a fundraising event, and hand over a few hundred dollars for a good cause. We feel good, go home feeling like we really did something special. I love what Brendan Burchard said at the September conference I attended. When asked if he donated money to any specific charity, he said he was a spontaneous giver. If it shows up in front of him, and it feels right, he gives. No plan, no big announcement to the world. What ever happened to the giving without wanting anything in return. And this means not announcing it to all your business contacts and social media. Wow, is that even possible anymore. I think it is, and I know many business people that are giving every day with little notice. I loved the pay it forward approach to giving, although the whole Tim Horton's pay it forward episode got a little out of hand.

Now as an entrepreneur I work with non-profits all the time. But I do it a little different. I gift them space and support, then allow them to do their own thing to promote themselves. I think that is called empowerment. My relationships with Suit Yourself and the YWCA are solid and I even show up to volunteer from time to time. Working with the people, building long-lasting relationships is what really excites me. For me there isn't a line between business and personal, it is about people. 

So ladies, shine your light, be generous with your heart, be kind when you don't have to, give some time even when you are busy. Hold the door for that mom with a full grocery cart, or just smile at someone as they pass by. That young lady at the Starbucks may have just lost her mother to cancer, that grumpy guy at the grocery store may have just lost his job. You don't know the stories, so give them the benefit of the doubt.

Then go home, pour yourself a glass of wine and say to yourself "I am fabulous"!

I would love to hear some ideas of how to give without getting.

Please Share your ideas.

Dianna Bowes is the founder of Fabulous of50 and the editor of Be Fabulous! Magazine.

Dianna was the winner of the 2011 YWCA Women of Distinction Award in the Turning Point category. She is a creative soul, who loves connecting people and embracing life. And loves to ride the Edmonton River Valley.